It's summertime and there are lots of busy bees collecting nectar and pollen to make their wonderful sticky honey. As you watch the bees burrow deep into each bright bloom, and as you listen to their drowsy drone, you can feel the warmth of the golden sun on your skin and you become more curious and your mind begins to wander…..
How does the Bumble Bee fly?

According to scientific fact he can't. The bee has a huge responsibility to collect pollen and nectar every day, all day, to take back to the hive to turn in to honey. The more important role of the bee is to pollinate the blossoms. Without the bee we would not have many of the fruits and seeds that we eat. What a challenge the bee faces.
What would happen if the bee knew he couldn't fly…?

I'm wondering how you react when faced with a challenge or a change, doing something new or making a difficult decision.

My last newsletter was about setting goals. Have you set your goals yet? Have you started to take actions towards achieving them? If you have that's great. What else can you do now? If not what is stopping you?

Lack of confidence and self esteem, the belief you aren't good enough, fear of failure? We all have these thoughts at some time or another. Where do they come from? A baby in arms has none of these fears or limiting beliefs. So what happens in life that leads some of us as adults to experience these?

'My thoughts weave the tapestry of my life'
- Louise L Hay'

FEAR = False Expectations Appearing Real

What is a BELIEF? Dictionary definition = 'A principle accepted as true or real without proof'

'The most important opinion a person will hold is the one they hold about themselves'
- A Robbins

Beliefs drive our behaviour. We confuse them with facts. They become our guiding principles. People will kill for their beliefs. Look around the world today. Wars are caused by people fighting for their beliefs.
Some of our beliefs offer us freedom and choice. Others disempower us and take away choice.
'I can't' 'I should' 'I must' - are all expressions of our beliefs.

Take a moment to write down some beliefs you hold that start with those I statements. Do you feel those expressions limit you? Ask yourself 'what prevents me?' 'What would happen if I did?'

Our beliefs are given to us by our parents, our friends, peers, our teachers and our experiences whilst we are growing up. We generalise, delete and distort our experiences to create our own reality.
We take aspects of our experiences as representative of the whole. We pay no attention to exceptions. This can be useful because it lets us respond to new situations on the basis of what we know and have learned. It is a problem however if we generalise wrongly and do not stay open to new experience. Beliefs are examples of our generalisations. We make a generalisation that we know how to open a door. So every door we come to we know how to open it. Different handles or locks do not faze us, we eventually open the door! If we make a generalisation that all men are violent or all women are selfish then this belief will cause us harm in relationships.
We have to be selective about the information we experience. Our brains are bombarded with 2 million pieces of information every second. We have to delete a lot of this information or we wouldn't be able to cope! We either discount them from our experience as unimportant or we don't register them at all. This is useful unless we are deleting information we should be paying attention to. i.e., feedback from others.
We change our experience by magnifying pieces of it or diminishing it. It is a bit like the Hall of Mirrors at the fair. This is useful when redecorating our homes - we distort by using our imagination to create what the room will look like when it is finished. However if you imagine you know what another person is feeling and thinking when they look at you a certain way then that is a dangerous distortion, especially because you will respond to your distortion.

So through generalisation, distortion and deletion we create our reality.
Our brains cannot distinguish between what is real and what is imagined. So when we imagine the worst happening our brain responds as if it is happening.
If you think it will happen it very often does - a self fulfilling prophecy.
Perhaps once you did something and you didn't get the results you wanted. So you develop the belief that you can't do it, or that you are no good at it, you're useless. You have generalised the facts to create your own reality. If you did it again and learned from your experience you would become better by making continual small improvements (the Kaizen way).

Would you prefer to change some of your beliefs? Would you rather have empowering beliefs? The ability to choose and change your beliefs is one of the key tools NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) has to offer. To find out more click here to contact me right now shona@goldeneggtraining.com. I will be happy to answer your questions. Choose your beliefs carefully. Choose those that give you the life you wish for.

Choose your beliefs carefully. Choose those that give you the life you wish for.

'When you move beyond your fear - you feel free!'
- Dr Spencer Johnson

When you change your beliefs you change what you do. Beliefs drive our actions. You can believe that change will harm you or you can embrace change and make it what you want. If you feel apprehension, are you aware that it is the flip side of anticipation? You have the freedom to choose your response to a stimulus. Will you feel fear or excitement, anticipation or apprehension? This is your choice.

People believed that a mile could not be run in 4 minutes. Then Roger Bannister ran the 4 minute mile. Within one year another 20 people had also run the 4 minute mile. They now had the belief that it was possible. They had the belief that they could achieve it. Accepting something is possible is accepting you can achieve it.

I work with people helping them to set their HUGGs (Huge Unbelievably Great Goals). They then turn these in to Outcomes and then make a plan of action to achieve them. Then they have the belief that they can achieve their HUGGs by achieving small steps.

'The man who moved the mountain started by taking away the smallest pebbles'
- Old Chinese Proverb

You have been learning and changing all your life - unconsciously.
Have you ever watched a baby learn to walk? Trying again and again to stand up?
The first teetering step - then PLUMP! Again and again on to the floor. What would happen if we didn't keep trying and adjusting?
Wouldn't it be wonderful if we kept trying and changing and persevering in life?
If we learn from each experience in life we will continually grow and expand our comfort zone.

You know that time when you weren't sure about doing something? A nagging voice was pulling at your thoughts? And wasn't it great when you did it? Looking at the results you felt immensely proud. So how is it we allow ourselves to be distracted by our negative self talk? How can we limit ourselves in life?

So begin today by changing your beliefs and then change your actions.

'Life is meant to be a never ending education and when this is fully appreciated we are no longer survivors - but adventurers.
Life becomes a journey of discovery - an exploration into out potential'
- D McNally

Have an experience -> Reflect on what happened -> Make sense and revise -> Plan for next time …. -> Have an experience

When you feel fear, nervous or scared ask yourself these questions.

What am I about to do that I feel unsure about?
What is the danger in it?
Is this danger real or imagined?
If there is no danger, is there something I am excited about?
How likely is it that the danger will cause me harm?
What can I do to protect myself from it?
If the worst thing I can imagine happens, what will I do?

List your negative beliefs. Eg;'I am useless at presentations'
Draw a box around them.
For each belief consider the following:
Who gave you that belief?
How do you feel about that person?
What is that belief costing you?
How would your life be different if you changed that belief?
What is the positive intention behind that belief ie. Is it protecting you from something?

now draw a cross through the box and write beneath it - 'That is not me'

Beneath the box for every negative belief write a positive belief. Eg; 'I am gaining confidence with every presentation I do and making improvements all the time.'

These beliefs can form affirmations which you can repeat every day.

And still the bee is collecting the nectar and pollen. He is blissfully unaware that science has proved he cannot fly. Because he doesn't know he can't fly he can and does.
It's lucky for us that he doesn't know this or else there would be no honey for our toast!

So stop saying 'I can't', believe you can and nothing will stop you.

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